Name: Ms. Lara Amusan
Role: : Programme Manager Royal College of Physicians
MA: What does wellness mean to you?
Wellness? Hmmmmm… as I ponder this word, I reflect on how poorly I treated myself in the past. I did not even think this word was applicable to me as an African woman trying to make ends meet in a foreign country. Just sitting watching TV with my children used to send me into a panic as I felt I should be doing something more worthwhile, and I was wasting precious time!!! I was raised by my proud beautiful African grandmother, who I remember would indulge herself every now and then, saying she deserved to reward herself. I don’t know why I didn’t learn this myself given I had such a clear role model.
Wellness to me means placing a value on my personal wellbeing. Loving my present imperfect self and putting me first. My present (imperfect) self is who I am now, not some future perfect me that I used to feel I had to become. A friend once said, ‘saying yes to everyone, means you are saying no to yourself more times,’ and that is what I did for many years, put everyone else before me. Hitting 50 and the last few years of the pandemic has given me a new insight into wellness and how important it is that we know as African women that we do not have a cape and we are not superwomen. We are proud imperfect women who need and deserve to be wholly loved and valued, and to wholly love and value ourselves.
So, wellness to me is holistic, it involves my mind (intellect and emotion), body (physical) and soul (spiritual) being looked after and fed in equal measure. It means being kind to myself, eating myself healthy, exercising myself, enjoying life, working hard and playing hard, laughing out loud, indulging and loving myself for who I am now in the present – and as importantly allowing myself to be loved for who I am in all my glorious imperfection!
MA: Are you currently prioritizing your wellbeing? Why and if yes, how?
As I said, I spent up my first 50 years not prioritizing my wellbeing, but all that has changed. I now love my present self – fat, stretch marks and all, sometimes mixed up and sometimes firing on all cylinders! I now take care of my mental wellbeing through spa breaks with friends, spending time with myself on long walks, hitting 10k steps a day, exercising, being kind to myself, forgiving myself, indulging and spending my money on myself without thinking about whether there are better things to spend the money on. I am doing this because there is a Yoruba (Southern Nigerian dialect) adage that says, ‘the way you use your calabash is the way others will use it,’ so I can now show my vulnerability and still be strong, compliment myself without arrogance, tell myself how remarkable I am without thinking I am bragging (because there is evidence) and treat myself like a queen. I am still on a journey and might relapse occasionally, but you know what? That’s ok, I will pick myself up and continue the journey towards total wellbeing.
MA: What can we do to make wellness a priority?
We can start sharing our wellness, helping our tribe (friends and family) to take their own small steps towards understanding what it means to them. Leading by example and letting my daughter understand that wellness is part of what and who we should be. African queen the time is now to take control of your well-being. Nobody else is going to do it for you. You owe it to yourself!
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Biography:
Lara Amusan is a proud Nigerian wife and mother of two, a Christian, an entrepreneur and the Programme manager at Royal College of physicians in London.
Amusan has spent over 30 years of her working life in the mental health sector in various disciplines. She is also invested in impact work, a passion that was inspired by her grandmother whilst working alongside her in orphanges, to love, and care for people expecting nothing in return. She is currently undertaking a project in Rwanda supporting communities to access clean drinking water.