Name: Rev Canon Diana Mirembe Nkesiga
Role: Anglican Church Reverend Canon and Award winning author
QN: What comes to mind when you think of African women embracing wellness?
It is hard to stereotype the needs of an African woman. It depends on whether she is in a boardroom, field, kitchen, business world, market place, at the well, or running her own launderette and whether she is a refugee, in a war zone or safe in a modern home. It also depends on the region she comes from and how she was raised.
An African woman needs to experience Shalom, which is not simply “peace” limited to the English word but the “peace” that means total wellbeing.
As a human being she is “body, mind and soul”. The African woman is deeply spiritual and she needs to be in that space where she can connect with her maker and experience his love, his presence and his intervention and leading in her life’s journey. She needs to cry out to him in her plight and to feel free to dance and worship him with all that she is and all that she has.
She delights in the rain season and gives thanks for the harvest, she weeps at time of loss and rejoices in the birth of a life. Within the Community is where she grieves and rejoices.
The African woman needs to be free to enjoy being African, African fashion, African headgear, braids, beads, accessories and to walk in her pride.
The African cloth is more than an accessory to her dress in rural and poor communities. The cloth she wears loosely round her waist helps her in practical ways. She ties her child to her back, it cushions her head as she carries a heavy load on her head, it gives privacy to the woman giving birth, it is the receiving blanket of a child born in the market place and wraps her tight in the time of grief.
The modern African woman needs to be comfortable in her own skin and should never be underrated. She needs to be acknowledged and appreciated both verbally and in monetary terms for her work. She needs to be treated with dignity, bring her unique self and experience to the table and having enough for her children and to see them succeed is central to her purpose.
All women need to be valued, secured, loved, and given opportunity to do what she loves most. A woman needs to belong and to be appreciated. A home , security, dignity, and access to nutrition, water and medical care is important.
She needs friends to walk the journey together, cry and laugh together plus share ideas and encouragement over a cup of tea.
Some women need to fulfill their call as leaders, be fully female in her leadership and not carved into a male prototype.
She should also be free to sing, dance and celebrate every small mile stone in her kids lives.
QN: Are you currently prioritizing your well being? Why? If Yes, how?
Wellness is very important to me at the age of 60 and has been since I was 40. Being real and true to who I am called to be as a female Priest can be so difficult when so many people stereotype the life of a priest and often, I do not fit into their mold.
Spiritually I am trying not to follow the spiritual trends but seeking and listening to God within the space outside the walls of the Church building while belonging to a parish and remaining accountable to my fellow Christians.
I want less of social media Christianity where you allow everyone to nourish your soul through their quotes and scripture reflections taking you away from a personal relationship and time with God.
I have chosen to retire early from full time ministry at 60 (before 65) in order to continue ministry outside the parish or diocese. I have chosen to work from the family retreat centre, which is a bit scary especially at this time when we try to keep our heads above water after the Covid pandemic.
Physically I am trying to eat right after the Christmas binge, eat less junk and eat right for my age and bodily needs. This year I have pledged to drink more water but I struggle because I prefer fruit drink and herbal teas.
As a widow also beginning to experience the Empty Nest Syndrome, I try to stay in touch with my peers, friends and keep serving and staying in touch with the youth. My siblings and a number of close peers are my sounding board. When I need a good laugh and plenty of encouragement I know where to find it.
I live outside the city and enjoy the fresh air and nature. Exercise however is not my forte but when I am not counseling, I endeavor to remain active and walk a bit. A good inspired hymn or song feeds my soul and worship space.
As I find my space and ministry during retirement, I am trying to become less of a ‘human-doing’ and become a “human being”. I am learning to say NO and not feel guilty about it and yet I am still exploring new areas, learning from the older wiser women. Keeping that balance is important to me.
We are well into March 2022 and I am still writing down my wellness goals in all seven areas of wellness. Spiritual, physical, emotional, occupational, financial, environmental and social.
One of my greatest fears is financial wellness, I have never been great at managing my finances, perhaps it is my personality type and I am much better at my relationships.
QN: How can the Church contribute to spiritual and overall wellness?
The Church needs to see us all as total being and not only minister to the soul. Jesus ministered to the total being. His relationship with women was transforming. He listened to the bleeding woman’s story and she moved from outcast to daughter. Her new relationship restoring her dignity, strength, and completely redefining her place and importance in community.
He engaged the woman at the well and by sharing difficult conversations about her faith and place in community, he enabled her to release from her shame and pain to want who is no longer ashamed to share her story among the village. “Come and see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Messiah?”
He lifted the place of women in society and ministered to their pain and restored their dignity. The Church should not simply see the women in their church as a source of their giving in monetary and in form of service below the pulpit. The church should preach and teach wholesome relationships against gender based violence and about the partnership men and women have in ministry.
Sermons must include positive inspiring and uplifting teaching about women. We need to hear of the Susanna’s, Mary’s, Joanna’s, Priscilla, Phoebe, Vashti and many more alongside, Paul, Peter, Daniel, David and Joseph.
Women should be encouraged to fully blossom into the God given gift that they are, instead of being seen as the temptress and distraction for men from achieving their spiritual goals.
The church should lift the place of woman, because when the woman is well, the family is well.
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Biography:
Rev Canon Diana Mirembe Nkesiga was one of the first women to be ordained by the Anglican Church of Uganda.
After earning her degree in theology, she was denied ordination but was permitted to become a commissioned worker in 1989 and a deacon in 1991. Passed over for the priesthood in 1992, she pushed authorities in both Uganda and then South Africa, where she was doing mission work to allow her to be ordained.
Finally in 1994, she was ordained by the Anglican Church in Uganda. Returning to South Africa, she had difficulty finding a placement as a priest until Bishop Desmond Tutu intervened. After 13 years in South Africa, she returned to Uganda in 2005. She is currently the Vicar of All Saints’ Cathedral In Kampala and an Associate Chaplain at St Francis Chapel Makerere, Kabanyolo.
Rev Diana also Co founded Nkesiga Cancer Foundation in memory of her late husband Rev Dr. Solomon J.B. Nkesiga who suffered from GALL BLADDER cancer and succumbed to the illness in 2015.
She is also an award winning author and family Counselor with a passion for inspiring others, creating new spaces for healing and supporting both the girl and boy child.
Wonderful and inspiring. Thank you, Diana. May the Lord continue to use you in His vast vineyard